“As Bryan's mother walks the grounds that she shared with her family she screams out to God, “Oh, God!  Why did you take him away from me?  Why?  Why?  Why, did you take him away from me?  Bryan!  Bryan!!  Bryan!!!  Oh, God!  Why did you take him away from me? 

Bryan had a big heart.  They tell us that our hearts are as big as our fists.  Bryan’s wasn’t that big!  It was the size of 4 or 5 fists, maybe more!  And, God, as you know, Bryan could forgive anyone…just like your Son did. 

I cried and begged him not to forgive the man who had stabbed him but he did, because he told me that his goal was to be Christ like.  I watched in pain and I watched from afar as Bryan forgave and loved this man. 

Oh God, as you know, he died sharing his last bit of food with this man…”Just like Jesus shared his last supper with Judas.”  Yes, the man that had stabbed Bryan several years ago told me that Bryan had bought the food for that day, the day that Bryan died.

Oh, God, I’ll never understand your ways, your Son’s ways, or my Son’s ways.  All I know is that my heart yearns to be with my Son.  Bryan loved me no matter what. 

Bryan would always tell me, ‘Mama, I will live my life obeying Matthew 15: 4.  I Love you and Dad so much!  I will always honor the both of you.  You and Dad have always been good to me.’  I would hug him and cry tears of joy.  I felt like the luckiest mother in the world to have been given this Son.

So you see, God, as you know, my heart has been dying little by little ever since my Bryan died.  It grows weaker as the days go by.  It is dying, but only because it is breaking into bits and pieces for my Son's embrace...my Son who had eternal love for me, like your Son did. 

I know deeply in my heart that I can feel Bryan's love all the way from the other side.  It is a strong love, a love that cannot be explained.  He has been calling me since he took his last breath.  Bryan’s call is what will take me to the other side. 

Bryan is my protector and my guide.  I want to be with my Son for he is with you God. 

The star that stills my attention every morning, as I say good-bye to my husband tells me that Bryan is up there waiting for me.  From the Heavens Bryan and I will protect everyone that we love.”